Invisibility : Visibility

No sunset to seeEverything from sky to waterBecoming silver metallic blueThe sun is still setting even whenObscured by cloudsThe sunset is just not visible in the skyLight rays still come throughJust not visible to the eyeVisibility is a choice to look at realityThe colors of yesterday’s sunset are bright in my memorySince PD I am evolvingI am still meBut I am not seen in my sufferingTo my familyThey have not once seen me sinceThe tremor and the twisting took placeThey do not see the dystoniaThat twists my foot , my hand and my faceOften feeling so aloneSince I learned I had to stand on my own from my childhoodBecause it’s easier for some not to lookOut of sight and out of mindI am their memory of what I once wasThey were not there to support meBecause they couldn’t see past their personal cloud which I was behindThat is my invisibility to my familyMy internal tremorsThe burning pain of dystoniaWhen I move in slow motionThe times I hide insideGive my disability invisibilityI am not a problem to themThey never saw me fallThey never saw me struggle at allIf people care I am happy to shareWhat gifts came with PDFriends I made and new supportAppreciation for every momentAnd learning to box was a new sportI developed a strong desireWhen dystonia on my entire left side makes me feel I am on fireI decided to fight harderand not give in to the pain ,I have to do all I can to take care of myself and my brainIf a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it does it make a sound ?I don’t like invisibilityIf something isn’t seen , it doesn’t mean it doesn’t existI decided I wanted to be seen as I amThe visibility of my PD symptoms Is reality . The tremors and dystonia twisting my body is part of me .The choice is to accept and adaptI am choosing to inspire.And doing all I can to preserve my quality of life to allow me to be there for my children as their mother .

Used by permission of the author.

Karen Rosenbaum

Karen is 55 years old and was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease in 2019. She lives in Glen Rock , NJ ...more